The past few days have hit me hard. I don't feel well (mentally, emotionally, and physically) and I think that stress has taken a toll on me. As you know, the rent house has fleas and Riley knocked his ribs out of whack during football practice. The doctor's appointments for the ribs cost us $120 - I know that it had to be done, but when you are budgeted down to the penny any little unplanned expense really hurts. Even worse - the flea situation has cost us over $650 ($350 in lost rent and over $300 trying to get rid of the little bastards). The plan for the month was to completely pay off the $820 Sam's card balance and then next month pay off the around $900 Capital One balance. That is not going to happen now and it put me in a serious funk.
Then it hit me yesterday ... I can't change any of this. I CAN'T CHANGE IT! I CAN'T CHANGE IT! I CAN'T CHANGE IT! I probably told myself that a million times. Why am I wasting time being upset about something that has happened and can't be changed? All I can do is plan for next month and hope (and pray to the God of Sam's Club) that we will have the money to pay off at least one of those credit cards.
I am going to use this depressive funk and turn it into motivation. I am going to call and make doctor's appointments and finally figure out why I feel so bad. I am going to send out query letters to book agents. I am going to send out query letters to magazines. I am going write an email about possibly telling my story to education students so that new teachers can avoid situations like mine. I am going to start working on my next book.
Sitting around and being unhappy about things that I can't change won't solve anything, but using those bad situations to motivate me might change my future.
Hey, good for you! I am one of those people who stresses about uncontrollable things too. I really wears on me physically. And freakin' awesome that you're writing a book! You should feel insanely good about yourself for that! Good luck.
ReplyDeleteI have written one book and am currently looking for an agent. Even if it never goes anywhere ... I am proud of myself for doing it.
ReplyDeleteIt's a good book! You're right you can't change any of it, you can only change the way you choose to look at it. Hang in there Gina!
ReplyDeleteWhen ever I feel dark and depressed my mother reminds me that the most beautiful flowers and plants and the strongest of trees germinate in dark damp places.
ReplyDeleteGood luck, girl, and hang in there!
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