Best Laid Plans

We have all heard the line from the famous Robert Burns poem about men and mices making little plans and how just when you plan on doing something then it all turns to shit and you end up sitting in your kitchen floor covered in rice krispie treat goo and drinking wine straight from the box. Well that probably wasn't EXACTLY what Mr. Burns was referring to, he probably had a cask of wine with wood splinters in it, but you all know what I mean.

Well last night, I made plans. Oh glorious plans ! Plans that any mother would dream of making. Plans that were going to cure cancer and end war ! Plans that were going to make liberals and conservatives hold hands together around a Christmas tree and give the world a Coke. Well you know what they say (thanks to Mr. Burns). The best laid plans of mice and men often go to shit !!! I am paraphasing here, of course.

On the drive home last night, I dreamed of how I was going to take a nice long bubble bath (after threatening the children to leave me alone of be forced to eat cold oatmeal with worms for dinner). They would of course cry "No mother dearest - not again!" and go to hide under their beds. Then when I got out of the tub, I would watch my shows on CBS (Christine and Gary) while painting my fingernails and then snuggle in to watch Glee while eating my dinner (aka a whole bag of microwave popcorn covered in Kernel Seasons Ranch topping !!!) Seriously though - if you are a popcorn eater be sure to go to www.kernelseasons.com and order you some - be sure to tell them that that blogger chick who writes about the dumbest crap sent you and you will get a free Kernel tattoo (ok - they give you those for free anyway but there for a second I felt really important).

Anyway - back to my plans going to shit. As soon as I pulled into the driveway at home (after going to get my lottery tickets and picking up my son, Bryce, from his friend's house) Rachel and Emily come running out to the car really freaked out and screaming about Riley fainting and falling on his face. This was not good. He did this once before during the summer and the doctor at the ER just chalked it up to heat exhaustion and sent him home. Well it is fall in Oklahoma - it can't be the heat this time. So I go running up the stairs after them and he is sitting up in bed with a blood soaked washcloth under his nose. He is pretty much out of it and can't really tell me what happened. I call the fire station and talk to Derek, who tells me to take him to the ER (duh - was planning on doing that anyway just wanted him to know what was going on). We load him in the car and me and the boys head to the hospital.

They run test after test on him and everything comes back normal. EKG - Normal. Cat Scan - Normal. Blood Work - Normal. Blood Pressure checks - Normal. He had a pretty major freak out over the IV, which was tough for me to watch even though he is fourteen years old. It doesn't matter how old he gets, he will always be my baby boy. They basically tell us that they can't figure it out and that we will have to make an appointment with his regular doctor who can order an EEG to test for seizures. Scary stuff ! I quickly forgot about my plans for the evening and decided that a bubble bath could wait and that I could just watch Glee online some other time. So for now - we are in limbo - don't know why he passed out and his face looks like he has been in a bar fight (and lost). Luckily (yeah right - real lucky) he must have hit the ground somewhat centered because the break in his nose did not cause it to bend to one side or the other. They don't even tape them in the hospital now - they just wait until the swelling goes down and then evaluate what to do next. His face is so swollen that he can't chew, he can't smile, and he is having trouble breathing out of his nose.

So for now - we are taking it easy for a few days - and not making any plans ! :)