Friday, June 11, 2010

Confessions of a Grilling Virgin

Derek and I had been planning on cooking out Ranch Burgers pretty much all week, but with his dad being in the hospital our cook-out plans kept getting pushed back. The meat was slowly browning in the refrigerator and I didn't want to let $16 of hamburger go to waste so I decided that me and the kids could figure this out (with a phone-a-friend option). I mixed the ranch salad dressing mix, meat, and cheese together (Derek normally adds bacon bits too, but I forgot). I made little patties for the first time ever and proceeded to try to figure out how to turn the damn grill on. I confess that I have never mowed a lawn, vacuumed a room, or grilled anything, but I a woman "hear me roar" so by gosh I was going to figure this out. I turned the tank on ... heard the little clicks ... turned the main dial on .... stuck the lit Aim N Flame down in the grill .... NOTHING .... turned the main off and back on ... stuck the lit Aim N Flame back down in the grill ... NOTHING ... turned the tank back off ... turned it back on ... stuck the lit Aim N Flame back down in the grill ... NOTHING. Proceeded to call Derek, who by this time was driving his dad home from the hospital. HE LAUGHED AT ME !!! Sure I wanted him to come show me how to light the damn thing, but he didn't have to get such perverse enjoyment out of the fact that I couldn't figure it out. What an ass !!! An ass that can light the grill on the first try.

Riley pretty much took over the grilling after we finally got it lit and flaming. He loved it, so who was I to step in and take away his enjoyment. I just walked outside every few minutes to make sure that he hadn't burned his eyebrows off. "Hey mom ... check this out ... if you squish the burgers and let the grease run down into the fire then the flames can almost reach my face."

"STEP AWAY FROM THE GRILL" ... wait rethink that .... if I don't let him grill then I have to do it myself. "JUST TRY NOT TO SINGE OFF ANYTHING IMPORTANT" Sometimes you just have to let them make their own mistakes.

1 comment:

  1. I'm always afraid I'm going to blow up the house when I have to use the grill. The ignition button is broken, so you have to turn on the gas and stick a lighter thingy in there. Always looks like a recipe for disaster to me.